To Text or Not to Text

To Text, or not to Text, that is the Question:
Whether ’tis Nobler in the mind to Suffer
The rejection and heartache of outrageous Dexting,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of iPhones,
And by opposing end them: to Text, to Talk no More

Now, I felt it was about time somebody updated this little soliloquy.  This thought came to mind as a good friend of mine was asking my advice on to text…or not to text a guy she is dating.  How sad is it for us that our modern version of dating is now Texting?  She had been feeling under the weather and hadn’t heard from him in awhile.  I asked if he had phoned, or emailed, or even offered to come and check on her in person.  The answer was No, he hadn’t texted all day.

Isn’t it crazy?  Our new version of trying to get to know somebody is through a little screen and the speed of our fingers.  I know that technology has added an extra element of hardship to what is already a really difficult pastime.  Very few people really like dating.  Those that do either want to be unattached or have already found a really solid partner.  The rest of us?  We go up and down weekly, if not daily, as to whether or not it’s all worth it.  The madness we feel when we think we are being rejected, the anger we feel when they are playing games and the guilt we feel when we just don’t like them back.  Trust me, dating is hard enough without technology.

Once upon a time you talked on the phone every few days, perhaps had a date once a week and then as time marched on you found yourself attending major functions and sharing social lives.  It wasn’t easy to meet people, but the selection was smaller and the attention more focused.  I can still remember when MSN and ICQ were the new ‘it’ thing.  I spent HOURS talking to boys that I liked on the computer instead of in person, but at least then it was the best, cheapest and easiest version of real-time we could have outside of actual interaction.  But now..NOW I can peruse my ex’s photos, check out the friends of my new crush and stare endlessly at that Facebook message box praying they are “into me”.  Since when does not hearing from a friend in two weeks mean they don’t like you?  In this instant-gratification, reachable-all-the-time world is when.

Now…we all know what everybody is doing all the time.  Our iPhones tell us when messages have been read, facebook tells you when somebody is online and dating sites let people message you as you browse.  All this real-time policing is a bit scary…maybe the book 1984 had it right all along, but Big Brother just took a very different form than we imagined…social media.

And yet, here I am using social media to spread this word.  In many ways, even though I need it to house a blog, even though I need it to keep a job…sometimes I wish there was a technology implosion.  Sometimes, just sometimes I wish things were simpler and that godforsaken smart devices didn’t exist.  Sometimes, just sometimes, I wish we could go back to the old days where you had an answering machine, or better yet…a notepad.

The Ginga Ninja

For God’s Sake, Just Say it Already!

For anybody out there in a creative communications field, or even just very adept at the English language, you may have heard the quote, “I made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter”, as written by Blaise Pascal.  Well, it’s true because the mere fact that rascally devil Mark Twain tried to take that quote and shorten it to, “If I had more time I would write a shorter letter”, just goes to show you how poorly Monsieur Pascal did in the first place.  Then again, he was born 60 years after Shakespeare, so thou dost believe he may have foundeth extensive difficulties in this task.

I, for one fail miserably.  Funnily enough, at work I am currently mentoring my intern on how to write in simpler terms.  Write short?  Ya, right.  How on earth could I get all my witty andecdotes out there then? (kidding…well, sort of).  But, let’s be honest, it is incredibly difficult to do.  Why do you think there are so many brutal tweets floating in the digital world and why do you think all these terrible acronyms were invented “FML, LMAO, LOL, OMG”…or my brother’s favourite…”OMFG”? It’s because there are things we all want to say and cannot in 140 characters or less!  Also noted, when reading some of my friends’ texts, I swear I’m chatting (I can’t believe I just called it that) with an illiterate sailor who cannot spell or avoid swearing in a one-sentence message…they want to say so much more than they want to type!  C’mon, just give in, type YOURSELF and get over urself.

Once again, who am I to really judge anyone?  I am a recent iPhone owner and am incredibly guilty for shortening (you) to (u)…but the (u) is actually next to the (i) and pretty consistently I mistakenly hit the wrong one, COMPLETELY changing the message (oh HOW funny)…and more importantly I am now getting off topic. Butttt, more often than not I end up sounding like a narcissistic ass.  Somehow the meaning of “I suck” changes when it becomes “u suck ”.

But, back to the point…which, I inadvertently just proved.  It’s hard to stay concise.  My grade 12 English teacher (let’s call him Mr. Pretentious Douche) told my mother I would never achieve an ‘A’ in his class.  I was younger than the other students and he believed it took a certain maturity to grasp the English language.  What I soon discovered is that he believed in brevity.  Shorten your sentences, simplify your words, say more in less.  3 months later….I got an A.

Take that.  Short enough for you?

The Ginga Ninja

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