Category Archives: Famous Quotes

New Year, New You?

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mmI’m sitting here with thoughts in my head and lazy in my fingers…barely just willing myself to type. Don’t let the title fool you, one night cannot make an entire new you. A you that makes resolutions, recommits to passions and hobbies, and tries harder to be good at the things they are good at and even better at the things they aren’t….suuurrreee…but a new you? C’mon people.

Who in their right mind really believes that one cold night in winter (well, in certain countries) makes you a different person, or even makes you dedicate to being a better person. I gave up on resolutions years ago because frankly, you give up on them quickly and stress yourself out when you are failing.  What about just trying to be okay everyday?

As I say this, I did just make homemade soup, am watching Jeopardy, sat down to write for the first time in months, read 10 chapters of a book, mentally recommitted to playing my guitar and did yoga for the first time in a year…but I won’t call these things resolutions…I will call these things the things I shoulda been doing all along.

So resolve to be the version of you that operates best and most content, not the version of you that doesn’t exist, because trust me, if you do…you will not only let the new you, but the old you down too.

The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing. – Walt Disney

The Ginga Ninja

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The Neverending Story

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1dfffc445d3e85da28400c495fc9a67eSome things are just never done.  Have you ever noticed that? It’s infuriating, no seriously. No matter how many loads of laundry you put through, how many showers you take, how often you sweep, or even how thorough you shave your legs….it’s never really done.

The saddest part of this is that these things only really finish when we do.

I guess in that case it’s important to put in perspective that with all the annoying things finally being finished, so would all the good things.  All the sunsets you could still see, the rollercoasters you could ride, brussel sprouts you could eat (if you actually like those disgusting little morsels), or kisses you could muster.  Put it in perspective.  Every end is a beginning and every beginning is an end.

Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.
Winston Churchill

The Ginga Ninja

New Year, New Perspective

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article-2344762-1A68F156000005DC-570_306x423How close minded are you? In today’s day and age, people are told not to settle. We can all survive without a partner and chances of that partnership lasting are slim. So, we date, we live together, we sleep around and sometimes we think long and hard before we commit. But, all this “not settling” and hesitation means that we can become very (for lack of a better word), picky. We want the perfect partner for us. The person who adds to our life, not detracts and the person you could live with for awhile, even if not forever.

Gone are the days of meeting naturally. The pond is bigger, the competition is fierce and we know deep down, we may never meet that person who will complete us. With online dating comes a plethora of knowledge long before you’ve even met. We can pinpoint our exact type down to their astrology sign. But, has all this knowledge made us hard?

On paper I know my type. But, if I’m honest, I rarely have sparks with on-paper perfection. I once started talking to somebody who lived in a neighbouring town. When asked why it was a problem, I stated that I didn’t want to drive 40 minutes to see him or spend my weekends away. Been there, done that, have the war wounds. BUT, in the same breath admitted that I was fully willing to commit to somebody in a different country. My friend very quickly caught the obvious flaw in my argument – you aren’t willing to drive to another city, but you are okay with another country?

It made me realize how small we have painted our visions of our perfect partner. We know what career they should
have, how much they should make, how many siblings are ideal and what geographical region they should live in. The hurdles we create are so high that nobody will ever finish that race. But, once in awhile, every once in a big, blue map2moon, we meet somebody who forces us to throw it all out the window. Their accent, religion, upbringing, family life, job, view on politics, and country are completely wrong and yet something about them is completely right.

This same friend of mine also admitted that her ex-boyfriend was perfect. He was the perfect gentlemen, the perfect boyfriend and better yet the perfect ex-boyfriend. They were blessed to have the amicable breakup that we all dream of and to this day he maintains she is wonderful and he would’ve loved her forever. BUT, despite this dreamy Ken doll being the epitome of what she thought she wanted in a man, instead she found herself attracted to a much older, divorced, folically-challenged father. A person that never in a million years would have made her cut-off list was suddenly candidate number one.

This made me think…why are we all so narrow minded on who we want to be with? When it comes to love and logic, rarely do the two ever coincide. I read a great article put out by a dating site reminding us that when you follow your heart over your head, you may just be surprised who you end up with. Maybe that funny, musical, poetic guy who gives you nightly backrubs has a different religious upbringing or education level. Maybe that six-figure ringing social climber with the great job, car and condo actually lacks emotional intelligence and empathy. We can’t go out and create the perfect person, because frankly, one doesn’t exist. All we can do is trust our instincts. Sometimes it may be in the form of logic, other times lust, but the only way to learn, grow, or maybe make the best mistake of your life is to risk the unknown.

We build too many walls and not enough bridges. – Sir Isaac Newton

The Ginga Ninja

The Moody Mind

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I think I am in a writing mood, nay, I am in a writing mood.11429225895_5b5a1f76d4_m

I haven’t been in one in a long time, or maybe more appropriately I’ve been putting my time elsewhere. With spring and summer come social events, the desire to be out and about – 9 o’clock seems early and sleep unnecessary.

Give me fall and winter and what you have on your hands is a bit of a hermit. Some nights I’m bummy and wishing for some fake life or love that doesn’t exist and some nights I want nothing more than to rush home to my fireplace, television, new pillows (mooorreee new pillows, I truly think I have a problem) and get lost in a movie, crockpot, new television show, or a painting. Fall and winter turn me into an ever-elusive introvert and funnily enough cause me to be more tired than ever.

Now I’m an educated soul. I’m sure it’s my hideaway nature and lack of exercise that’s making me more tired. The less you do, the less you want to do. It’s a vicious little chicken and egg cycle. We are too tired to get out (and let’s be honest, I already work full time +), but the less we get out, the more tired we become! What a conundrum….#firstworldproblem if there ever was one.

showimageBut, there are days, and I know I’m not alone; I can’t put my finger on the problem. It’s not life altering, it’s not life-changing, but I’m in a mood. A pensive, lonely, frustrated mood…like you aren’t getting all you should out of life, and yet, that is life. Nobody is ever really alone and the internet just proves it. In the past couple of weeks I can’t tell you the amount of people who have mentioned they are feeling down, stressed, tired, sick, frustrated, annoyed at dating…it’s universal, or perhaps universal when you live in a country with very distinct cold weather patterns. There is a reason that suicide rates are higher in cold countries. No joke.

So, I guess I need to decide whether stressing out about my dirty apartment and unfinished painting is the right way to go, or hitting the gym, hitting the bar and maybe hitting on a boy is the better avenue (I kid, I kid…I would be out for my friends, wink wink). The sad part is, as I sit here and type this, the fact that I can type this or even have a choice in these decisions shows how fortunate my miniscule little life really is.

So on that note, I guess as long as you have a choice you have a life, whether that be hiding away in your loft like a troll or getting dolled up like a princess, there is usually tomorrow and only when there is no tomorrow do your choices cease to exist. So, you make the call…how do you want to spend today?

Every man builds his world in his own image. He has the power to choose, but no power to escape the necessity of choice. – Ayn Rand

The Ginga Ninja

That’s Why They Call it the Blues…The Winter Blues

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winter-bluesI’ve been extremely, overwhelmingly sick in my (well we’ll call it short) lifetime. Sometimes more than others and probably for different reasons. At the end of the day, normally I end up fatigued in the winter, get a respiratory infection, land myself on antibiotics and eventually get really ill with stomach problems and bacterial overgrowth. But, even hospital-inducing illness aside, the one thing I’ve always been known to struggle with is SAD. No, not just a big old frown on my face, but Seasonal Affective Disorder (otherwise funnily enough known as SAD, which is exactly what it makes you).

In changing a fair bit of my lifestyle and diet, I was able to somewhat escape it. Heaven forbid I live like a normal sucker and just get the winter blues instead of sweating, fainting and illness. This year however, well a flu led to a cold, let to lethargy…led to…and that’s where it ends goddammit. We’ll call mine, the Winter Reds.

It’s a cold, dark winter and I’m in the heart of the most depressing month. But, I’m doing my best to stay above water. Stay positive, accept that a basic “not giving a crap” attitude may come out of this and I will probably survive. Probably. Maybe with too many headaches, cramping muscles and bad moods, but probably still at least a step away from death’s door.

Well, I’m not alone in this battle. Cold cultures have a higher rate of suicide and divorce in January. People struggle with lethargy, lack of motivation, fatigue and a general depressing state in colder months. It’s why vacation hot spots peak and prices skyrocket. It’s why cold month babies are created and love handles exist. The winter months have our basic instinct bodies reverting to a sense of hibernation. Deep down, all we need is to stay warm, feed and save our energy. If we don’t, we just may not make it through alive.

So, this year I’m celebrating my SAD. That’s right, I said it, I’m HAPPY to celebrate my SAD.

A sad soul can kill quicker than a germ. – John Steinbeck

The Ginga Ninja

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Missing your spoon or shovel?

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red-buddha (1)I’ve always been the first to believe in signs. To believe in signs, larger meanings, karmic justice…you name it, I’ve thought it. I can list off a finite number of times I received karmic justice, but not always. No, not always.

Well, today I find myself sitting here thinking there is no deeper meaning or destiny. It is all chance and the actions of individuals. Their risks, their kindness, their anger, their selfishness. Go out and be all that you can be, but don’t believe you are destined to be it. Go out and risk and take challenges not because those will bring you where you are meant to go, but maybe because they will bring you where you never intended to.

I’m tired. I’m tired of waiting for some bigger thing to evolve. It’s not going to happen. This is just the way it is. And I’m so tired of people telling you to keep dating and keep waiting for that all-hallowed match. Don’t settle. Don’t be scared. Don’t be shy. Know what I think? Be whatever you want to be. Do whatever you want to do. If you want to settle – settle! If you don’t want to settle, be prepared for a life potentially alone. Because to be completely honest and completely bitter…the ride on the way to meeting somebody great is a soul-sucking, exhausting, anti-adventure that only the foolish will follow.

Okay, okay. I realize this is all a little pessimistic for my newfound enlightenment, but today I am mad. I am mad because I managed to reconnect with somebody to only have 2 weeks and 3 failed date attempts later him decide the universe didn’t want us together. The universe? You bailed because you were tired, grumpy and ditched me for better plans. So, in the end he wanted to cut our losses while we were ahead (Ahem..our) because though he wanted to go out, he just didn’t believe it was meant to be. Let’s be honest about why, because the universe is intervening or your selfish nature is? Either way, in the end he said he wanted to end with no hard feelings and on good terms – smiley face. My answer? I think good terms may be a bit of an overstatement.

Sure, I’m as rational as the rest of them and have realized holding out for something to work out is like waiting for a third limb to grow out of my ass, but don’t try to feed me bullshit and tell me it tastes good. You get out of life the effort you put into it…or so they say. That in itself may not even be true. Just realize you will have good days and bad and sometimes life just ain’t fair. People ain’t fair. Timing ain’t fair. Circumstance ain’t fair. Maybe there is no bigger meaning to it all. Just surviving can be your indicator for success, well that and maybe managing to leave some ice cream in the damn container.

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former. – Albert Einstein

The Ginga Ninja

 

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Where’s Freud when you need him?

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freud-illustrationAwhile back I tried to write a post about dreams. The problem? It was only a dream.

I’m kidding. The problem was that I was having so many at the time – holding hands with friends, spooning strangers, random people and sad situations…it was a very long and complicated entry; one I always thought I would edit when things were a little more clear. Instead I’m starting over. The other morning I woke up from some very strange and unsettling dreams. Nothing overly bad happened, but sometimes you gotta wonder – what exactly is your subconscious trying to tell you?

My buddy Sigmund Freud is considered the Daddy of Dream Decoding. He believed that nothing happened by chance and that every action and thought is motivated by your unconscious at some level. http://www.dreammoods.com/dreaminformation/dreamtheory/freud.htm

I awoke from a dream where I was at a party with a lot of my old friends. Correction, my ex-boyfriend’s friends, but once we broke up they slowly left my life. It’s sad, but hey, it’s life. Anyhoo, I was catching up with them all – slowly making my way around the room to find out where they lived, who was married, who broke up, their 3rd careers…you know, the usual coming of age fare. It was nice, except for my ex beau and his new squeeze were fuzzily in the background avoiding me like the plague, or more accurately, barely aware I even existed.

Fast forward time, as dreams often do and suddenly we were in my apartment (which was really a hotel room) and I was having an after party. For some reason I owned two places and was being told that I had to give this one up (ha – as if I could ever afford that) – but, this very loft that has helped liberate and create who I am today. A lot of lonely nights and a lot of blog entries have existed here, but a lot of independence too. Like usual, there were now two roads diverged.

But, in that room were a few of those friends, an annoying new suitor, my ex and even the boy before him. When I awoke, it seemed so real, having the two lost loves in the same room. The one was chatty and friendly, like he was in real life…the other hard to read and silent… like he also was in the flesh and blood. My feelings about them in the dream were reminiscent of my feelings about them in life. The one that is more resolved left the room and left it in a friendly way. The one that may or may not hate my guts sat there quietly and mysteriously not saying a word.

I told a couple of people about my mixed feelings when I awoke. It all felt so real. It made me for about an hour want my old life back. It made me for about an hour want my ex-boyfriend back. It made me for about an hour feel like nothing had changed, when really everything has changed. Dreaming about an ex can mean many things – feelings unresolved, the desire for affection, missing a relationship, entering a new one, or even meeting somebody who reminds you of them. Usually they are proposing, you are kissing, they are dying…but very rarely are they just there. I’ve dreamt about them separately and at times with confusion, but never, ever have I dreamt about them together – two worlds crashing, but neither my world any more.

The funny thing about my dream was it wasn’t set in the past, it was in the present. The fact that they were both with other people was known and my feelings about them seemed to be screaming from their actions. Subconscious my ass. It could have simply been emotions unresolved about the way that life and love worked out. But, more so than that, the fact that old chapters of my life were there and I was being told to let go of this new one because clearly the second apartment was newer and nicer may speak volumes. What I have tried to avoid is people telling me how to be or what to do and yet, it still plagues me from time to time. What I have tried to avoid is the need to have the best, the most, the biggest or the baddest and only have what works for me, but it too still haunts me every now and again.

As my life progresses I have a difficult time of supporting my decisions, but also of letting go of the past. Even if it’s wrong right now, a day will come when I will need to let go of this sanctuary and move on. Maybe them being there and being there in the exact same way they were in life was simply speaking to the choices I’ve made, the roads less travelled and that well-known fact that life is ever-evolving and ever-changing. Maybe mentally I’m preparing for something big again. I’m acknowledging what I have had to sacrifice to get where I am and what I may have to again to keep moving forward. I don’t know what that something is yet, but perhaps we need to let go of a bit of the past in order to have a shot at the future.

Dreams are often most profound when they seem the most crazy.                                                                                                                                                         –  Sigmund Freud

The Ginga Ninja

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