Tag Archives: christmas

The Weight of the World

Standard

driben-peter-pin-up-girl-on-scaleFor a number of years now I haven’t really had to watch my weight. As long as I was gearing my diet more towards the food that made me feel physically better, well, the scale was watching itself. I could eat until I was full, drink when I wanted and really there wasn’t much to monitor. I had mainly cut out soda pop, limited sugar, minimized wheat…all in all it seemed like the diet modifications I had made had made me! Until recently…

In the last few months, I’m not sure if I can blame Christmas parties and boys, excess beers, or some new medication I’m on, but I gained. I gained what (to me) feels like a lot in a short amount of time and let me tell you, it’s not a good feeling. Now, I’m aware what water weight, pre menstrual weight, scales at night versus morning, naked versus clothed is all about. I can usually tell you my “real weight” within a pound or two just from how my clothes are fitting and know full well to ignore a lot of what the scale says, trust me, I’m a motivational scale guru for many.

That is, until today. Over the last few weeks I’ve actively been a little better. I did a cleanse (oh dear god, why we purposely give ourselves straight up diarrhea is beyond me), I’ve cut back my drinking, I’ve tried to minimize portions and go back to healthy snacking and less meals out. I’ve minimized that bread and returned to my sparkling waters and almond milks. And god bless the current boy as either he is blind and hasn’t noticed those increasingly-tight jeans, or he really just does love big boobs, but I could honestly say I think a pound or two has slid off and I’m feeling just a little sexier, but then again, what do I know, right?

Today the scale lied to me, or truthed me and I’m lying to myself. But, it had me up 3 lbs from a number I already was less than pleased with. And then 2 minutes later down 11lbs from that. And then 30 seconds after I had dropped another 7, and then regained 14 and then went back to the original weight. In a 4 minute window I was an 18 lb size difference, which is a lot when you just wanna know if a little less beer payed off!  I decided you know what? If I (think) I’m doing better, well, that’s step 1 and if my scale can bounce me from mental breakdown to win the lottery weight in a 4 minute window something must be wrong. I can assume that I am probably somewhere in the middle of all that and the most important thing is really the weight off my mind. So, I’m going to ignore it entirely, assume it’s broken and re-assess things base on how I’m feeling and things are fitting, not on a machine that can’t even make up its own mind (oh wait, that’s right – machines don’t have minds).

I guess that’s the best way to handle life. It’s about how you feel, not what you hear, not what you see, not numbers on a contract, things in a house, vacations in a scrapbook. At the end of the day, how you feel about you and your decisions is the only thing that really matters…you are just made up of matter anyway.

You gotta ask yourself this question. Am I gonna believe all those bad things those fools say about me today? Am I gonna to believe all those bad things those fools say about me… – Constantine, The Help

The Ginga Ninja

 

images

Advertisements

Twas a Modern Day Christmas?

Standard

santaTwas three days past Christmas and all through the flat, many creatures were stirring, even my cat. There were no stockings hung by the chimney with care because there is not really a chimney, only a gas fireplace there!

Adults were nestled all snug in their beds, with visions of cleanup and New Years in their heads.  But mama in her scrap room and I, with my blog, were not ready for bed and poured some more nog.

With Magic Mike in the background and my cat at my feet I contemplated my diet and what not to eat. The New Year is a challenge, we all know it’s true. But, my 5 Christmas pounds demanded something to do.

The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow made me fear that my neighbours car soon would need tow. When what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a text from my friend about her holding a beer.

With an impish friend so lively and crazy, I feared tomorrow morning I would be quite hazy. A rapid typist, her liquor types came, by text she enticed and listed by name.

Now Vodka! Now Jager! Now Molson and Miller!

On Red Wine! On Coolers! Come visit my Chiller!

To the top of the street, to the top of the block! Come party at my place, it’s only a walk!

Looking at the clock and my PJ cladden self, I contemplated, debated and questioned my health. I knew self and health didn’t really rhyme, but thought “Nah forget it, who has the time?”

And then in a twinkling, I wondered “Should I go? You only live once and my health is so-so.”  Then typing too fast I hit the wrong key, and somehow in Spanish my ? became É.

If Santa were real, would he encourage me to drink? Would God punish me and Buddha cause me to think? Is there a time too late or an age too old, or is age only a number and life is meant to be bold?

My eyes how they twinkled, my thoughts how merry! As I imagined the taste of a maraschino cherry.  My droll little mouth drew up like a bow when I pictured a beer as cold as the snow. I knew it would hurt my newly dentised teeth, but the thoughts they encircled my head like a wreath. Despite my broken-out face and my currently round little belly, alcohol was calling me now instead of my telly.

I feel quite chubby and plump, but whats a drink more? And I laughed at my circumstance; god life is a chore.  A memory, a giggle and a shake of my head, soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

I spoke not a word, but went straight to my work, fixing my makeup and hair like a jerk. And putting some cover on the tip of my nose, my esteem started rising and my spirits they rose.

I sprang into action and got my butt out of the door, only to realize my feet were still glued to the floor. It was only a dream…I had slumbered upright…Merry Christmas to all and to All a Good Night!

The Ginga Ninja

This slideshow requires JavaScript.