Category Archives: Drinking

Some of us cope in some ways…some of us cope in others.

The Weight of the World

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driben-peter-pin-up-girl-on-scaleFor a number of years now I haven’t really had to watch my weight. As long as I was gearing my diet more towards the food that made me feel physically better, well, the scale was watching itself. I could eat until I was full, drink when I wanted and really there wasn’t much to monitor. I had mainly cut out soda pop, limited sugar, minimized wheat…all in all it seemed like the diet modifications I had made had made me! Until recently…

In the last few months, I’m not sure if I can blame Christmas parties and boys, excess beers, or some new medication I’m on, but I gained. I gained what (to me) feels like a lot in a short amount of time and let me tell you, it’s not a good feeling. Now, I’m aware what water weight, pre menstrual weight, scales at night versus morning, naked versus clothed is all about. I can usually tell you my “real weight” within a pound or two just from how my clothes are fitting and know full well to ignore a lot of what the scale says, trust me, I’m a motivational scale guru for many.

That is, until today. Over the last few weeks I’ve actively been a little better. I did a cleanse (oh dear god, why we purposely give ourselves straight up diarrhea is beyond me), I’ve cut back my drinking, I’ve tried to minimize portions and go back to healthy snacking and less meals out. I’ve minimized that bread and returned to my sparkling waters and almond milks. And god bless the current boy as either he is blind and hasn’t noticed those increasingly-tight jeans, or he really just does love big boobs, but I could honestly say I think a pound or two has slid off and I’m feeling just a little sexier, but then again, what do I know, right?

Today the scale lied to me, or truthed me and I’m lying to myself. But, it had me up 3 lbs from a number I already was less than pleased with. And then 2 minutes later down 11lbs from that. And then 30 seconds after I had dropped another 7, and then regained 14 and then went back to the original weight. In a 4 minute window I was an 18 lb size difference, which is a lot when you just wanna know if a little less beer payed off!  I decided you know what? If I (think) I’m doing better, well, that’s step 1 and if my scale can bounce me from mental breakdown to win the lottery weight in a 4 minute window something must be wrong. I can assume that I am probably somewhere in the middle of all that and the most important thing is really the weight off my mind. So, I’m going to ignore it entirely, assume it’s broken and re-assess things base on how I’m feeling and things are fitting, not on a machine that can’t even make up its own mind (oh wait, that’s right – machines don’t have minds).

I guess that’s the best way to handle life. It’s about how you feel, not what you hear, not what you see, not numbers on a contract, things in a house, vacations in a scrapbook. At the end of the day, how you feel about you and your decisions is the only thing that really matters…you are just made up of matter anyway.

You gotta ask yourself this question. Am I gonna believe all those bad things those fools say about me today? Am I gonna to believe all those bad things those fools say about me… – Constantine, The Help

The Ginga Ninja

 

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Caught in a Life Triangle

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redhead, love triangle, archieHow many times has broken telephone stepped in to complicate your life?  He said that she said that her sister’s mother’s friend’s babysitter’s cat saw you talking to your neighbour’s teacher’s principle’s daughter and heard that you said…..And then somehow gossip starts, accusations fly and you are caught in the middle of a crossfire of words.  Every innocent thing you said or open-minded thought you had gets twisted and you are meant to defend your opinion, or worse yet, defend your defense of a situation, conversation, or person.  I guess they say Defense is the best Offence. I don’t think they have a clue.

I try really hard to play devil’s advocate when I can.  Everybody has a side, a heart, a story and a point of view.  Every single situation needs a grain of salt to measure it.  Wouldn’t I love to be an ant on the wall when things went down in the first place – sure, but history, hurt feelings and ultimately egos get involved and suddenly you are caught in a triangle.  Whether with an old friend, an arch nemesis, a new romance, or a family member…when your name gets pulled into something, there is nowhere to run from the war of words.

Now, don’t even get me started on Love Triangles.  Most people have never successfully avoided them – no matter how minor.  Somebody’s boyfriend flirts with their friend, somebody lies, somebody hides, somebody cowers and somebody yearns. Without them we would’t have such wonderful films as Something Borrowed, My Best Friend’s Wedding, Made of Honor, Bridget Jones Diary...or an actual good movie, Legends of the Fall.  I seem to somehow be that girl that attracts boys in almost-dead relationships.  I don’t step outside of the lines once I’m aware of what’s going on, but either I have “she’s a friendly soul, bare your heart to her” or “good in bed” stamped on my forehead, because let me tell you… I attract em like flies.  And if I’m completely honest, I’ve had a friends’ ex or two come to me after the fact to say they always liked me and were too scared to admit it.  Thankfully I have the good sense to say no thank you kind sir, but often the mere fact that it came out causes a new and awful moral dilemma. To tell or not to tell?  And all these things? Frankly, make me feel sick.

I don’t like drama, I don’t like having to defend myself, my actions, or my beliefs and I definitely don’t like the awkward position that two people’s history can put other people in.  My advice?  Don’t be a devil’s advocate in a world full of individual lives – people look out for themselves and not all people like looking at all sides.  One side suits them just fine.  But, being too passionate about any one topic will see you get in almost as much trouble; maybe you just feel more passionate about that wall you are leaning on.  I guess the only way to avoid this is to avoid people, avoid feelings, avoid circumstance, avoid speaking and become a fingerless mute who can neither say, (nor text) anything that could ever get them in trouble. I’ll work on that because no matter who is right and who is wrong…there are usually shades of grey somewhere in there between those solid colours of black and white.

The funny part of this is while I’m writing this post; I’m watching the all-time classic movie Grease and sitting riveted as all those triangles unfold.  If only Danny admitted to the guys he cared about the girl and didn’t “summer love” her on the beach…all would have been fine.  He wouldn’t act non-nonchalant in front of her at the bonfire, she wouldn’t date the dumb jock, he wouldn’t join the track team, Cha Cha wouldn’t be a problem and don’t even get me started on Kenickie and Rizzo.  But, then again…had all these triangles and misinterpreted events NOT occurred, there would be no plot.  No Summer Lovin, no scenes under the stars, we wouldn’t learn the hand jive and we definitely would never get the dictionary updated with “shoo bop shoo wada wada yippity boom da boom”.

So.  Did I just teach myself a lesson?  Each time life hands you lemons, grab the tequila, because goddammit, alcohol helps you through drama. Oops, wait, that’s another lesson.

There is no avoidance of being involved from time to time in petty misunderstandings and relationships woes.  Want to know why?  Because then you would be perfect.  And I don’t know about you my friend, but I’m only perfectly flawed.

Gossip is the Devil’s Radio – George Harrison

The Ginga Ninja

Why Should You Never Iron a 4-Leaf Clover?

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Because you don’t want to press your luck!

Do you actually have to be Irish to get away with Irish Cream in your coffee?  God I hope not.

Either way, I’m an 1/8 Irish….so I like to think at a minimum, I can pull off Baileys in my coffee without a second dubious glance.  This of course only works when I don’t constantly announce how much I enjoy Baileys in my coffee, or try to use my ginger hair as proof I’m Irish and only if I can refrain from doing it daily.  But, who wants to refrain from doing it daily?

Once again I want to say I’m kidding.  And I can say I am….with a little uncertainty. Maybe I’m just kidding myself.red leprechaun

At Christmas and at cottages, I do get a bit carried away.  Baileys (or my poor girl’s version of it….Carolans, Panama Jack…you get the picture) tastes delicious in coffee, with milk, or just on the rocks. So, trying to refrain for financial, bodily and let’s face it…social stigma reasons do exist.  However, I did have an old co-worker, a creative type, an “Ad man” persay….who kept a bottle in his drawer and pulled it out shamelessly, proudly and in no way, shape or form was he (or did he pretend to be) Irish.  Italian if I remember correctly.

So, this is to my old friend Keith.  Keep drinking that Irish Cream buddy and I’ll raise a toast to you every day, especially St. Patrick’s Day.

The Ginga Ninja

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She’s Positively Positive

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red picklePickles.  Olives.  Garlic.  Panna Cotta.  Cream Cheese Icing.  Wheat Beer.  Red Wine.  Cats.  Music.  Art.   Movies.  Quotes.  Massages.  Long Hair.  Bright Colours.  Talking.  Reading.  Sleeping.  Cooking.

These are all things I like.  And every time I find myself down and out I need to remember all the things I like…all the things that make me ME and all the things I would miss if I weren’t around to enjoy them.

You don’t have to like these things, but there would be another similar and yet unique list for you.  A friend once told me to focus on one good thing that happened each day.  It puts into perspective that through all the hard times and through all the uncertainty…shines through compliments, bright shiny moments and ultimately things that you….like.  So, even if the world doesn’t always like you, there will be parts of the world you like.

So like that wonderful commercial with the curly-haired little blond girl who emits positivity and recites:

I like my dad, I like my cousins.  I like my hair, I like my haircuts.  I like my pajamas.  I like my stuff.  I like my room.  I like my whole house!  My whole house is great.  I can do anything good, better than anyone.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kKswLd65Ws

Readers, I like you.

The Ginga Ninja

If my feelings were Grapes, they’d probably make a good wine

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red grapesIs it okay to have a crush?  After a long and meaningful relationship or two, when is it okay to stop isolating, start looking and literally crush on somebody?  Crush like a kid, crush like you haven’t crushed in years. C’mon, even crushes can hurt – otherwise, why would they be called CRUSHES?

But, when do I start keeping an eye open just for me?  Not waiting to date because I’m scared, not rejecting everyone because I’m busy, not waiting because I have baggage, or am afraid of what others think, or don’t want to be like all those other people who just find the wrong “one” again, too soon.  That’s not to say it may not be the wrong one again either way, but when has enough time passed that I can have an honest to goodness crush?

Well, I don’t have that answer.  Three weeks probably isn’t long enough, but three years is far too long.  Either way, I’m intrigued by the intrigue that I feel and I think…so for now I’m not going to overthink it and just feel it.

Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other – Oscar Wilde

The Ginga Ninja

Super Bold?

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260417_Enlarged_1So, this weekend was the Super Bowl.  Normally this wouldn’t warrant its own post, nor would this post come so close to the last.  But, as per usual – I was faced with a bit of a pickly predicament.

To me, the Super Bowl is just a party.  I have three older brothers and over the years many male friends – so the Super Bowl is a mix of beer, commercials, and usually a food extravaganza.  This year I knew that I could force myself upon the same crew as last year, or go visit my brother who with a cold and bucket of chicken had every intention of parking his ass on his couch, but I decided…nah…this is the year I’ll actually be a girl and have no plans. There is no male figure forcing this upon me and I wouldn’t have to worry about navigating a Monday hangover. But, opportunity knocked and fortunately, (or unfortunately depending how you look at it), I answered.

Just recently I joined a gym.  An urban hipster gym that apparently also throws major events.  I decided to get my ass out of my loft and into the gym this afternoon.  However, when I arrived there were gourmet food trucks parked on this little street and heavenly smells wafting into the workout rooms.  One of the staff told me they were hosting a Super Bowl party and as a member my admission was free!  She encouraged me to “check it out” as she, other staff, and other new members (like me) were going to go down.

So, I did.  Wow.  I never expected it to be so big.  There were huge screens, couches, waitresses, music, and hoards and hoards of people.

I quickly felt incredibly out of place in gym clothes, no makeup, a sober state and every time I tried to sit at a table somebody pointed out how they were “saving that for a friend”.  That fear that everybody secretly harbours about walking into a place alone and being ostracized actually came true.  I ended up standing in a corner, nursing a beer and talking to the wait staff.red_racer_ipa

So, that begs the question – is putting yourself out there, or being open to new opportunities always the best advice?  I have girlfriends who can’t go to a convenience store alone, whereas other friends can easily go on vacations with only numero uno.  So, what would you do?  When faced with party, beer, and a free ticket in…would you “check it out” or would you take your sweat-pants laden self directly home to the couch.

I decided to split this somewhere down the middle.  I hung in there for my one beer, grabbed some beeramisu and headed home.  I gave myself a little pat on the back for trying.  Is it better to have tried and failed, then never to have tried at all?

True champions aren’t always the ones that win, but those with the most guts.  – Mia Hamm

So, next time life takes you out of your comfort zone, ask yourself…what would you do?

The Ginga Ninja

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Twas a Modern Day Christmas?

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santaTwas three days past Christmas and all through the flat, many creatures were stirring, even my cat. There were no stockings hung by the chimney with care because there is not really a chimney, only a gas fireplace there!

Adults were nestled all snug in their beds, with visions of cleanup and New Years in their heads.  But mama in her scrap room and I, with my blog, were not ready for bed and poured some more nog.

With Magic Mike in the background and my cat at my feet I contemplated my diet and what not to eat. The New Year is a challenge, we all know it’s true. But, my 5 Christmas pounds demanded something to do.

The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow made me fear that my neighbours car soon would need tow. When what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a text from my friend about her holding a beer.

With an impish friend so lively and crazy, I feared tomorrow morning I would be quite hazy. A rapid typist, her liquor types came, by text she enticed and listed by name.

Now Vodka! Now Jager! Now Molson and Miller!

On Red Wine! On Coolers! Come visit my Chiller!

To the top of the street, to the top of the block! Come party at my place, it’s only a walk!

Looking at the clock and my PJ cladden self, I contemplated, debated and questioned my health. I knew self and health didn’t really rhyme, but thought “Nah forget it, who has the time?”

And then in a twinkling, I wondered “Should I go? You only live once and my health is so-so.”  Then typing too fast I hit the wrong key, and somehow in Spanish my ? became É.

If Santa were real, would he encourage me to drink? Would God punish me and Buddha cause me to think? Is there a time too late or an age too old, or is age only a number and life is meant to be bold?

My eyes how they twinkled, my thoughts how merry! As I imagined the taste of a maraschino cherry.  My droll little mouth drew up like a bow when I pictured a beer as cold as the snow. I knew it would hurt my newly dentised teeth, but the thoughts they encircled my head like a wreath. Despite my broken-out face and my currently round little belly, alcohol was calling me now instead of my telly.

I feel quite chubby and plump, but whats a drink more? And I laughed at my circumstance; god life is a chore.  A memory, a giggle and a shake of my head, soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

I spoke not a word, but went straight to my work, fixing my makeup and hair like a jerk. And putting some cover on the tip of my nose, my esteem started rising and my spirits they rose.

I sprang into action and got my butt out of the door, only to realize my feet were still glued to the floor. It was only a dream…I had slumbered upright…Merry Christmas to all and to All a Good Night!

The Ginga Ninja

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